**EMERALD EYES**

Whipping Insomnia

 

Beating Insomnia

The 3 M’s: MMM ;)

1)***Music

2)***Massage

3)***Making Love

Rules:

***Break ‘em!!!” ;)

and

Music: ONLY wordless. Caution: run from any CD that has the words “relaxation” on it! “Relaxation”  translates to borrrrrring.

Massage: Full-body again no talking, only music and other ambience… I  usually prefer to give one first so I can fully relax while receiving the magic later or I’ll feel “frisky” all night. If you’re lucky enough to have one offered up front, (I’m honestly trying not to pun…it’s hard… not mine!!)

Making love: Words, costumes, and props optional. Receiving a massage following is mmm so that I’m not revved up all night from natural energizer batteries.

When Desperation Strikes:

If none of the 3 above or combo induces blissful sleep or is available, indulge in imagery. Skip the floating in the water scene and go straight for the juicy jugular:

~Mix thinking up 4 wee hour, prank phone call cocktails to people who annoy the ^%^%* out of you, knowing you’d be anonymous

~Add 3 doses of decadent dirty dancing to lure the one who should have already massaged your luscious body to heaven!!

(click here for the video ;))

~Whip up  2 dollops of cookie dough to finger paint wacky messages on the mirrors all over the house because it’s more fun than using lipstick but eat your creations (the evidence) as you go. Gives new meaning to “sweet nothings”

~ Finally: stick yourself in the freezer- well open the freezer door- for one refreshing blast  of air to cool down or point out… throw on your comfiest clothes or….not… , and slip back into bed, tenderly kiss your bedmate as you accidentally play footsies, but I don’t recommend bringing the ice cubes in then or you will still be up for hours…

 

Counting Sheep is Baaaad

q      Insomnia No-Nos

q      (Yes, folks, this is the 2nd re-post of this popular piece. It's that time of year: "tax time for artists" which means I'm creating lots of work for shows and filling commissions too close to 24/7. I relented and put a sleepy photo of myself to the right. It's small, so hopefully you can't see the dark circles that are permanent shadows of my life as a bonified insomniac. Gem took the photo a couple of springs ago when we attended a reception for my paintings that were in a juried art show at gorgeous public gardens near us.)

q      Here's a photo of the jewelry I'm wearing in that photo.

q      It's supposed to draw you away from my very sleepy green eyes. I designed  a monochromatic green color scheme using stunning, handmade lampworked glass, dyed pearls, and other beautiful stones that simulate jade, plus antique copper for old-fashioned appeal and to set off the color in the focal handmade stone. This  "Misty Memories" collection  is limited edition although many of my designs are one-of-a-kind. My speciality is accomodating client requests while staying within that person's budget. I've made necklaces at half the price of the one a client has seen on me, in my portfolio, or on my website, that has a very similar look and feel to the jewelry they liked.

q      (c) 2008 Gel "Misty Memories" Jewelry Collection (Please click on the  photo to see the gorgeous stones enlarged!)

q      About a year after this art show, I went to a new hairdresser and wore this because she had expressed keen interest in my jewelry designs. This necklace and earring set was the exact shade in her eyes. She fell in love with it, in fact, so mesmemized by the unusual look and colors that I needed to take it off and put in in my purse so she could concentrate on cutting my hair!  The next time I saw her I wore it again. It was near Valentine's Day so she chose her own gift and thereby saved her husband from needing to pick out one himself!

q     ______Read  below for INSOMINA NO-NO's______________________________________

q      1)Raiding the fridge. You're too bleary-eyed to avoid eating from containers whose contents fool you into thinking "this looks yummy", but it's really recent (enough) left-overs guaranteed to give you the runs.

q      2)Cleaning out the fridge. Even w/ the kitchen exhaust fan running on high, the odors from those mystery containers will linger like a private sewerage line increasing in stench, as soon as you lay your head on your pillow & attempt sleep again.

q      3)Cooking. Others in the house will awaken & want to eat your delicious concoctions, thereby destroying your solitude & wolfing down your goodies.

q      4)Making to-do lists. They grow longer than Pinocchio's nose, especially if you begin color coding or prioritizing the items. Besides, those lists have a way of becoming infinite from middle of the night guilt.

q      5)Tweezing your eyebrows even if it's been 3 months since the last "weeding out." Blindness is not a desired side effect.

q      6)Reading the dictionary or blogs. They're too darn interesting. In fact, do NOT read anything. If you're like me & the majority of bloggers, anything you read will hold your attention for HOURS. Before you know it, it's dawn.

q      7)Beginning your exercise regime, even though you finally "found time" to fit it in. Two days later you'll be so bleeping sore from overdoing it, the good intentions will backfire.

9)Paying bills. In fact, do not do anything cerebral. You need to wind down, not up.

10) Looking @ old photos or love letters from previous lovers who "might have been" if you hadn't dumped them or vice versa.  That will only make you laugh, cry, wonder what you two ever saw in each other or want …yeah that…& over & over again. "That" is good conversation, not just "*that*." *Wink* I don’t advise waking up your partner or  spouse…Afterall, YOU are coveting the sleep your significant other is blanketed in.

11)Trying on bathing suits. It doesn't matter how fit you are, this is not the time to check out the fit of any clothing.

12) Calling other night owl friends. Yes, you'll have company, but invariably what you say will be so boring or so soothing, you'll end up putting them to sleep, not you!

13) Calling your in-laws because, gosh darn, you finally found some time @ 3:30 a.m. so you thought you'd catch them up on your life, on your schedule, instead of when they awaken you at 6 a.m on a Saturday morning. (The ONLY reason I’d be awake that early on a weekend, would be to do the previously mentioned “That”!!!!!)

14) Calling the weather. That recorded message truly is recorded. It will remind you how lonely or bored you might be; it's no substitution for a human voice that is there with you...well, a soothing voice, not sputters like "yeah, snore, snore"...

"What? I AM listening! snore, snore...

15) Watching a little TV. "Little" has a way of enlarging as you press the right buttons, teasing that remote. (All-seeing Gel knows which readers are thinking of something else…so was I. Do you think the remote is really going to put me to sleep?Obviously, I do not fall asleep to the TV.

16) Looking upwards to the cobwebs in the corners of your ceiling or down very low to the grungy dust on the baseboards. Never stare at the carpet stains that no amount of "Resolve" spot remover will eradicate. Too depressing.

17) Thinking about all the people you know who are sound asleep. Envy is not sleep-inducing. Neither is plotting pillow suffocations of your well-rested friends or relatives. (Notice, I didn’t write “spouse.” How Gem lives with me, I’ll never know. ;)

18) Playing w/ your pet. First of all your pet will think you're crazy for disrupting his/her sleep. Then once the allure of play time wakes up your agreeable pet, realize that your adored animal friend will not grant you respite.

~~~*~~~* ~~~  Coming soon: Tried and True Tips for Beating Insomnia another re-post unless I'm able to put up a new post instead. ~~~*~~~*~~~

What's Love Got To Do With It?

What are some of your favorite romantic songs? Some of mine, in no particular order are:

Lady by Kenny Rogers

You Light Up My Life by Debby Boone

When I Fall in Love

This Magic Moment by Jay and The Americans

Babe  by Styx

Precious and Few by Climax

Afternoon Delight by The Starland Vocal Band

My Eyes Adored You by Franki Valli  The Four Seasons

Time in a Bottle by Jim Croce

Unforgettable by Nat King Cole

And of course

Shadows in the Moonlight by Anne Murray

I could list scores more, but I’ll save some for next Tues. Aft. Tunes.

I don’t need Valentine’s Month to have permission to express love and caring, but I sure do enjoy this time of year! A holiday that celebrates love and caring among family and friends beyond sweethearts, is a good one. Guilt induced “one day” only “must do” expressions are not my cup of tea so I honestly gag over most of the commercial products for Valentine’s day. (There are some that strike my fancy, but it’s a rare one.) I prefer we make our own expressions of caring and I make it a mission to find or create non-traditional Valentine gifts, not because I have to, but because I want to!

Gem is not “in the doghouse” if he forgets Vday, although he doesn’t forget. How could he with all my notes and Valentine Projects all over the house? :D  (If he forgot, he’d merely be banned from all the treats I have in store for him that go beyond the ingestible…If you believe that about me, then you’re a new reader in Emerald City!

Valentine’s Day is also another terrific reason to give to the charity or charities of your choice, especially by volunteering your TIME WITH people who have no loved ones. So many folks are lonely this time of year, especially after the hoopla of the holiday season and family events which is more than hard if you have no family or relations are strained. Valentine’s Day can be yet another reminder that there is no one special in their lives and that can be gut-wrenching and depressing. So smile more to strangers, go to schools, hospitals, nursing homes, or even your local library and give of yourself in *deed*, such as by engaging in conversation, reading a story, and especially listening to someone whom you can tell is alone, lonely, or sad. Connecting to others beyond the superficial and making a difference in even one other person’s life, outside of here at Emerald City, is what life is truly about and what love means to me on Valentine’s Day, beyond the special bond with my sweetheart Gem and our daughter Sapphire!

I delight in making valentines any time of year, so this month is an added bonus for creative expression. It lets me run wild with my wacky sense of humor and those puns I love to use. As a chocolate lover, it’s scrumptious to be able to ignore “healthy no sugar rules” and indulge. I do need to be gifted with choolate or I might need to resort to gifting myself to ward off the chocolate me-me-me’s!

I’m also looking forward to two book groups I belong to. One will have a luncheon (complete with chocolaty-ness) following our discussion  of A White Boy in Africa by Peter Godwin, an astounding memoir so appropriate for Black History Month.  Another evening group will gather for dinner after our book talk, just the gals, as a festive celebration of friendship and a good reason to indulge in chocolate!

Let’s not forget dancing. This time of year we can dance to our heart’s content, that is, if he is not traveling. (I will dance with other partners, if they are friends but Gem is my leading man, of course). Yep, precious readers, Gem will be traveling around Valentine’s Day as he has for the past four years, much to my consternation.  It’s not his choice. He does hope to be able to fly back in time for those Sat and Sun dances that occur ALL month.  I may need to whisk him straight from the airport onto the Gel-mobile before the moonlight disappears, but we’re as hopeful as we are adventurous.

I’m relieved that it has been socially acceptable for several years to “show you care” to those you don’t feel romantically attached to, beyond your family. For instance, I remember being touched when students who did not have crushes on me, made me cards or inventing puzzles on their own, without prodding from their parents. Some were traditional and brought me flowers (what a lovely surprise) or many knew of my infinite love of chocolate and indulged me. In turn, I adore setting out candy to share with them, dressing in Valentine colors of red, pink ,or purple, the latter being my favorite color as many readers now. Let it be stated that I first thought of purple as a legitimate Valentine color long before the industry expanded the color spectrum!

I also remember receiving platonic Valentine E-cards for the first time from male friends when all of us were happily married. None of them were “come-ons.” Or from gal pals. Those are  simply a nice friendship gesture with caring “I’m thinking of you” thoughts.

I was touched  to be remembered on Valentine’s Day. (I’m no longer in school so there is no huge box of Valentines. Maybe that’ s why many adults have adopted the practice of sending cards or surprise gifts to friends? Some of those guys and the guy friends of Sapphire specifically send cards or buy small treats or flowers for ALL their girls who are friends. I love that idea! That way, people are not left out if you don’t have a sweetheart.

My dad was loving and caring when I was growing in  some ways that were non-traditional. Long before others received Valentines routinely from their parents, I did. It was fun to look forward to the Valentine surprises he planned. For the longest time, I thought it was my mother who was behind all of these. When I learned it was often his idea, I wasn’t surprised. (That gleam in his chocolate brown eyes should have given it away sooner.)

Often, we’d receive a very tiny box of  Whitman’s chocolates or when I was much younger, or a coloring book. Little did I know then, that he was able to purchase these things because they were free from the place he worked. (If a box was damaged on the outer cover, it could not be sold or if the coloring book was torn, same reasoning.) (We grew up poor, but not dirt poor.)  He continued sending cards to all of us, including my brother throughout our lives, even after we got married. Yes, there were homemade ones and surprise ones. We did to them as well. But it’s those hugs I remember and miss the most: those glorious scoop me up high into his arms and squeeze me tight (even when I was an adult).

One set of my grandparents who lived far away, would always send cards, sometimes enclose a small present and always slip a $1 bill in the card or more. They loved slipping us money long distance or in person (it’s a grandparent thing I’ve learned), but I missed seeing them smile at me, because they cared about me and REALLY listened to me. I miss feeling their hugs beyond words, because we moved several hundred miles away from them when I was a child.  I used to see them every weekend when we lived in the same city when I was young. That was ecstasy, then. They played cards with me, read to me or me to them, and let me bounce my red rubber ball in their huge kitchen. What a concept! Bouncing a ball was allowed INSIDE the house! After we moved, we usually saw them only once a year- heartbreaking for me and later, I learned, for them.

You can tell I miss them a lot especially at times like these. These memories enfold and sustain me. I hope that someday I will be able to be half as wonderful loving grandparents as they were.

Love is precious. Happy Valentine’s Month to all! Don’t forget to share some romantic songs you like in the comments, please.

Snowed Under

To all those who were concerned and asked, thank you
but everything is fine. I’ve merely been "snowed under."
I hope everyone is enjoying the new year. Although it's
brrrrrrr here, I hope you all are warm
and cozy.

I don't make New Year Resolutions.
I do reassess several times a year
as in soul searching, particularly in relation to my
family and
community. However, once a year,
to resolve is not realistic, to me.
Instead, I feel,
it's a fluid and ongoing process of personal growth.
It's one where I'm open to growing, learning, and,
experiencing new
goals and dreams. We are all,
fallible so I find the strictness of a
resolution too,
confining and doomed to failure, especially because
I often expect too much of myself (that unrealistic ,
perfectionist
voice crawls out of my subconscious ,
too often and speaks;
I must subdue ,
those voices in my head!) whereas a continual process
is truly what life's journey is about. Sometimes I'm as
flexible as "Gumby"
and,
other times I'm as stubborn as a an old
(oh please make that young), goat!

What works for you?,
Do you find that resolutions help you?
Or do you have a loose list in your mind all year long?
What is your process? Have you already begun some changes? ,

What's your opinion?

I'm making a continued concerted,
effort to be be less rushed with
Gem and Sapphire. Notice the word "continued" so this is not
a New Year resolution. I hope this year they will do so more with
me and even for me. We have great times together,
but I still see where I could slow down the pace and
let more of life's routines slide by, to enjoy the moments
and life in general, in a much more relaxed fashion.

I'm guilty of often trying to cram too much in. It's nice when
there's balance. Muscles relax and smiles pop out.
(Our family had become too "Type A" in many areas and
it took its toll ,but we also have learned to be more mellow.
I'd love more mellow {yellow}.

I need to be more spontaneous and let some of those plans I make
just evaporate no matter how cool or creative they might be.
I know many others who could use more laid-back time, too.
Time IS finite after all!

I want those moments to be LONGER and be a mini visit instead of
a brief "wrinkle in time" spasm. So we try for about 10 min and
sometimes it stretches to 1/2 hr if no one truly has a place to go
or a deadline. It's such a treat not to rush! We've all fallen
on our stairs by running on them too often.

Here's my trick: Last year, I began sitting down to talk to Gem
and Sapphire instead of us standing in the staircase or hallway
always on the go. That physical act of "sitting down" slowed
and relaxed all of us. It felt so good to me that I realized
I should overrule Gem's and Sapphire's protests that
"they were fine standing."

The transformation when they sat down was incredible.
Tones in voices relaxed, bodies rested, and the
entire demeanor of everyone became more "front porch"
or "around the kitchen table" type of hanging out.

After we survived my insistence phase, I continued to gently
invite them to sit near me or I'd just walk away asking one or
both of them to follow me and we'd end up in a sitting area.
This has worked wonders!

Truthfully, I almost had to haul them into the den or
living room to sit, at first, because they are used to packing
in too much to do each day and night. This was also
a major self realization breakthrough because
I had been ALWAYS on my feet, so once
I sat down "for a spell", it took me several months to
realize how much better I was feeling.
That's when I cut back on (some) multi-tasking
and tried this experiment with my family.

On a related note, I think many of us have unrealistically
long daily "To Do" lists. We needed that
"in the middle of the day or evening” break instead of
at the end of the night when everyone wanted to collapse in bed.

This is in addition to family meal time talk, especially with our
schedules and life stresses, because we cannot eat enough of
our meals together. Due to jobs, meetings, volunteer work, etc,
we often do not eat together once Sapphire grew older
and was required to be at school for 12-17 hr days
(theatre rehearsals and production weeks).
That decline in family meal time has saddened me.

Now, these mini-sitting and talking daily breaks have greatly
helped us to tune into each other's lives and we're continuing
that much more naturally than early 2007. (Sapphire is at
college but when she is home, it's resumed.) To see their smiles,
to hear them laugh, even to be yelled at sometime,
is connecting, and living. I'm happy they also like not being
"ships passing". Gem and Sapphire each separately have
commented or shown via body language when they plop down
how good it feels. (Rather like a big ole bear hug!).
I can see that transformation in their bodies from
wound up tight, merely by sitting.

The moments now are more than the quick 30 sec rushed sentence
or phrase as someone passes another someone. Now there is
several minutes of conversation, eye contact, usually laughter,
and we all feel more connected. Plus, they delight in ribbing me,
because I'm well "ribbable." I like to kid back.
We've always been a teasing-each-other type of family.
That certainly eases up the monotony inherent
in chores and obligations.

Gem sir-prized me and I'm backed into a corner.
I had asked him to take a more active role in our social life.
Welllllllllllll, he suggested we take country dance lessons.
Realize I am not into country music. However, when one's husband
*finally* comes up with a new idea for socializing, it's not at all
prudent for me to be a "picky wife" so this is a case
where I need to be Gumby.
(Remember Gumby IS Green besides flexible :).
Lessons start in February. (Ok, I admit I found the lessons
and signed us up, but Gem thought of the idea!)

I'll let you know whether Gem has any toes left after our
first lesson because I'm a klutz when trying to line dance.

Many of you know that we love to dance. We usually ballroom,
swing, or Latin dance (or even the limbo- lol). We know very
little country and it's not our favorite type of music, but we
enjoy virtually any music, so it'll be a nice change.
Gem suggested it because it's been the rage here for a
good 5 years or so and  we want to  meet more
new people because so many folks in our area
move every couple of years. Since I'm truly awkward
with line dancing that means I have to be on the watch out
for those camera phones. Actually, I'll laugh and
have a good time. I can always sit down if I'm in
someone's way and watch Gem and no one will
know the difference since you don't need a partner!

Happy New Year Everybody! (I hope I can rescue my old posts that are not currently on this blog.)